Handholding the Heartbroken
It's her first brokenheart.
Her brother sent me a text message asking about asthma medicines that my stepdaughter needs to take because of too much crying. I winced because I just talked to her earlier and there was no trace of crying.
“She doesn’t want you to know,” her brother said.
There was something wrong.
After two days, as I slept, she called me and was now crying. “Mom, we broke up. I broke up with him and he was so angry, I could not even recognize him.” I comforted her with words I didn’t know where I picked up. “I want to go home,” she said.
As soon as I can, I picked her up from her college dorm and we went home together. The first few nights were filled with light sobs. In between, she came to me and lay her head on my lap as she bravely tells me about she feels. Unconsciously, she would tell me stories of how she thought she was betrayed and violated by her ex-boyfriend. The vivid details planted a little hurt and anger in my heart. Her stories now validated the ‘bad feeling’ I had towards the boy. At 21, I know it is now her business and I cannot just intrude. I tried to focus on telling her how to rebuild herself and her confidence, that this heartbreak will be healed in time.
I had to share this news with the husband. Knowing it was my responsibility to let him know, I also wanted to share the heavy heart I had seeing that our daughter got hurt. But my husband can only go so far to listen when speaking about the children’s heartaches. As strong as he is, he has a thin skin when it comes to the children’s pain and setbacks. I had to stop sharing when I felt his threshold was coming.
I brought our daughter to my mother for a little change of scenery. It was just one of those days in my mother’s home. There was no talk about heartbreak, just plain being-at-home. From time to time, I would talk to my daughter to ask about how she is doing. Slowly, throughout the days, the tears stopped coming and she picked up her hairbrush again.
I just brought her back to the college dorm. She was on TikTok as I drove her back.
She gave me hug before leaving me and said, “Thank you Mom.”
She will be alright. More than alright.
Your husband surely received the greatest gift in you. I love knowing you are 💯 this girl's mom. ox